


lockpicks can get though all locks

by Demun_writting



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Swapfell, Death, F/M, New account new story, Reader Is Not Frisk, Torture, Will add more tags as this goes on i guess, its gonna suck but oh well, kinda sad backstory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-13
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2019-01-16 18:31:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12348252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demun_writting/pseuds/Demun_writting
Summary: The mysterious mountain, perfect for someone who wants adventure, or danger, plus could monster really be worse than humans? guess you gotta find out





	1. The mysterious mountain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! my name is Demun and this is my first try at a swapfell story, I hope you enjoy!

Your name is ___. you've always lived in the bad part of neighborhoods, your parents worked a lot so you had a lonely childhood, you went to school, you made friends, and you had a stable living. of course, when you turned 14 your parents became angrier, they would argue with each other and yell at you. you would do nothing but your best, be an A+ student, and the good well-mannered child they could ever want, but after awhile of all the yelling, you decided to not be so nice anymore.

you started stealing from other students, at first it was small, a pencil, or a sharpener. soon it became a couple coins from their lunch money, things from their lunch, and soon you became really good at stealing. and with how bad the neighborhood is, your often locked out of the home when your parents aren't here to open it since you walk home by yourself. so you used the money you gathered over the years to buy a lockpick kit. you learned to pick the lock of the house, and other homes as well, you never stole from them but you did use their doors as practice and locked it back up when done. you became a secretly bad girl, you started seeing your mundane life as boring, so you did adventurous things as soon as you turned 16.

with a job you could afford to do things like bungee jump, drive, see exciting new things. but always kept them on the down low, your parents found out about your bad girl streak one night and confronted you about it, it started out as genuine worry, and you started to feel bad for worrying them. then it went from worry to anger. they yelled and yelled at you for being stupid, and each other for being awful parents, then the final straw that broke the camels back. your dad hit your mother.

  
she left you both, refusing to be in a home with a hitter, and a disappointment for a daughter. you ended up living with your father for another 6 years, you had nowhere to go, and he seemed to refuse to let you move out. trying to make you feel pity for the guy with fake crying, and saying how lonely he is, it was a long string of suffering living with him, until one day, a miracle in disguise came.

you were at your dead end job, you were on break from taking orders and listening to customers, today was your 22 birthday, and you decided to treat yourself by dying your hair a pretty shade of blue, you were never really one for dying hair, but something about the color blue was calming to you. as you were zoning out you overheard a conversation from two co-workers also on break

"so did you hear about that mountain?"  
"The one that no one comes back from?"  
"Yeah, I heard it was cursed or something, it rumor that monsters live inside that mountain"  
"Scarrryy, I would never go there"

this mountain...it sounded interesting.  
"Whats this 'mountain' you two are speaking of?" you called out to them, curious. the two of them jumped a bit, startled that you called out to them

"W-well there's a mountain, about a 10-minute bus ride there called Mount Ebott. its rumored no one comes back because the monsters there eat them!"

You thought about it, monsters. they couldn't be worse then humans could they?. you made up your mind and decided to ask to be let off early, you became good friends with the manager here, so she, of course, let you off free, marking it as a sick day. you hurried home, glad your father isn't here. he's most likely out drinking and picking up girls for another one night stand. you packed a couple things in your traveler's backpack you've been saving and planning for since the moment your mother left.

you put in three days of clothes with underwear, your favorite galaxy hoodie, your big lockpick set, your mini set which you keep tucked in your breasts, four boxes of chocolate covered granola bars, 200$ in cash you've hidden from your father for just this moment, a pocket knife, a bungee cord and harness you bought off someone for whenever you wanna go bungee jumping, your cell phone, a foldable tent with blanket and pillow, your locked diary which you use for mostly art, and your reading glasses, plus spare lenses. you had a tough time fitting it all in but you managed. you wrote a note for your father and left, using a bit of your 200$ to buy a bus ticket to mount Ebott, your gonna be the first one to go there and come back alive. you weren't afraid of monsters. because nothing can be scarier then humanity its self.

* * *

 

as soon as you reached it, of course ignoring all warnings you walked up the mountain, pushing your way through branches and trees till you reached a big hole. you got fairly close and looked over the edge, it was a deep drop and you could see something yellow at the bottom. you took out the bungee cord and harness and put it on, you hooked the cord onto the nearest strongest tree and made sure the items in your bag were well strapped. you backed up to the edge and fell back, a look of excitement and thrill on your face as you fell down the steep hole, unknowing to what awaits you within.

* * *

 

you woke up, wondering when you were asleep. you sat up, your bag and contents were fine. but your cord and harness were gone, you looked up and saw it hanging there, really far up. but you shrugged and got up. you walked through the door and saw a raggedy looking...whatever that is. it seemed to have noticed you and it cowered in fear

"y-you...you shouldn't be here!" thank you captain state the obvious. "You need to leave before _**he**_ comes in!" you were confused who this 'he' was.

"Okaaayy, first off, I can't leave. can't climb back up, and second. who are you, and who is this **_he_**?" the creature sighed and put on a strained smile

"HOI! ME TEMMIE! and you gonna die here if you don't leave! for its Kill or be Killed down here" you were gonna say something when a fireball came out of nowhere, hitting the poor temmie

"Not you again you pathetic welp!" a big, tall goat man with a crazed look in his eyes walked up, a fireball in hand aiming at the temmie. you quickly stood in the way, not wanting the small thing to be hurt, the goat seems to stare at you for a moment before giving a big creepy smile "Oh! howdy, excuse my manners. I am Asgore, protector of these ruins" he walked closer, seemingly more happy at the fact your not shaking in fear of him "Come with me, my child! let us leave this disgusting thing to die on his own" he didn't seem to let you speak as he grabbed your wrist in his big soft goat hand as he drags you off. you look back at the temmie still on the ground shaking in pain, you hoped he would be okay as Asgore took you through the door. he let go and pressed some buttons on the floor before pulling a lever "Come, come, my child! I'll show you the ruins puzzles" he leads you to a training dummy first though

"Of course first you must know my child, ITS KILL OR BE KILLED. so fight the dummy till its ruined!" you just stared at the dummy

"Hello there, you must be really into jokes because you're in stitches!" there was a silence as Asgore's smile twitched before bursting into laughter. the dummy didn't find it amusing and just floated away

"Wonderful joke! but enough messing around, follow me" he leads you to a hall, you notice there's an odd amount of dust in this place, does it ever get cleaned?. your thoughts were cut short when he points to some levers

"Pull the correct levers, now I didn't label them since that would be unfair" he walked over to the spikes blocking the path forward. you walked over to one of them and pulled it. then you went to the one next to it and did the same thing. on the third one though, as soon as you pulled it you heard a click, you stepped back quickly as spikes shot up from the spot you just stood on

"careful! the wrong lever means death" you looked at him with a 'what the fuck' kind of look

"Why?" he grinned at your question

"Because, you will never learn if you don't know that death is an option!" you went over to the last one, pulling it and quickly stepping back, only to see that nothing happened besides the spikes blocking the path went down "wonderful! now come along." you follow the goat, mumbling stuff about how stupid this whole thing is. you're brought into the next room with a tile floor with lots of holes in each tile "Now, follow me, and don't put too much pressure in your steps" you were paying attention to the floor you didn't notice the pattern he walked, when you looked up he was on the other side. you quickly put one foot on a tile with lots of pressure before pulling it back, two seconds later spikes shoot up from the holes. you didn't see the pattern so the only logical thing to do, RUN LIKE HELL!

"an unusual way to cross, but you still did!" you were wheezing and out of breath, but he didn't care as he dragged you to the next room. all the rooms consisted of puzzles of death in some way, it's not like you hate the fact that you almost die to all those puzzles, in fact, it's quite the thrill of knowing you _could_ die. but you got to have a moment to breathe when you reached his home

"Now I have a surprise for you my child!" he opens the door and brings you to the dining table, making you sit down as he walked to the kitchen, you found it weird when he called you 'child' when you were 22, but then again this guy could be super old for all you know, you don't know how monsters age. he came back with a slice of pie, he set it down in front of you and gave you a fork, watching you excitedly. you took a bite of the pie, and was surprised at how good it was! you started eating more, surprisingly feeling better than before, before asking

"whats this pie made of?"

"Butterscotch, cinnamon, and monster dust" oh yeah those seem like perfectly fine thi- wait..monster dust, you are eating a corpse!! you nearly choked on it before forcing yourself to swallow, nearly all of it was gone besides one more bite, you forced yourself to eat it. a forced smile on your face as he looked so happy

"Im so happy you like it, my child! would you like more?" you shook your head no vigorously

"U-um do you have someplace I can rest?"

"Why of course." he gets up and you follow him down the hall to a room, he opens it and the bed is...kinda small, I mean your short for your age sure, being 5'0 isn't the life but even this bed is too small for you

"this is your new room from now on!" from now on? does this guy expect you to live here forever?? well your too tired to deal with it right now, you'll worry in the morning.

"Thank you asgo-"

"Dad."

"what?"

"Call me dad, as you are my child" he ruffled your hair and left to the living room with glee. you closed the door behind you and dropped your bag down, you draped yourself on the bed with a sigh, this is what you wanted, you wanted something thrilling and new, and to be away from your father. you got exactly what you wanted, so why did you feel kinda empty inside?  
you decide to ignore it and lay on your side, curling up in the small bed and drifting off to sleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the chapter, i wanted to make the reader a kinda strong, sassy person with a knack for wanting a bit of a thrill. i'll write the next chapter whenever i feel like it, so that could be either today for months from now, WHO KNOOOWWSSS


	2. I don't need a skeleton key

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ruins become boring after awhile, maybe you can explore something you werent allowed to before

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was too inspired to stop writing so TWO CHAPTERS IN ONE DAY! gonna keep writing till im too tired and have to sleep

four months.

four months you've lived in these ruins, four months you've had to deal with monster dust in your food, and four months you've had to go bored out of your mind. you explored every inch of the ruins you could, you took a hand full of monster candy for later as well when you found the bowl. you interacted with some of the people still alive in the ruins, they tried to attack you which was the only interesting thing that's happened.

you were in bed, drawing in your diary when you heard a knock at your door, you locked it and put it away before opening it to see Asgore's smiling face.

"Im just letting you know dinner will be ready soon, so be sure to clean your hands before eating" he pats your head before leaving off to the kitchen.

he wasn't a bad guy he was just lonely and misunderstood. you got to know the guy fairly well as you lived with him, learning how he was banished to the ruins from his ex-wife, how he had two children but they were both dead, a mysterious person he puns too, and his interest in golden flower tea. he had many other things about himself that you learned but that would be too big of a list. you actually felt the guy wasn't crazy, it did take a lot of convincing not to murder the last remaining people in the ruins once, and he can be kinda insane at times, but he was a genuinely good guy, that just seems to have just gone insane from loneliness. he also put his number in your cell phone and often called you whenever he was out getting things, it was a tad annoying but endearing.

but with how long you've lived here, you felt as if there was something more your missing. and your curiosity for whats down in the basement was intense, but you couldn't get through yet with all those locks and chains in the way. you would have picked them sooner but you wanted to hang with this guy a while longer. though today you needed to leave, you grabbed your bag and got up. going to the kitchen seeing him cooking. he looks back at you with a sweet smile instead of the crazy one he gave you when you first met

  
"Hello my child, what is it you need? and why do you have your bag with you?"

"Asgore-"

"Dad."

"Right, Dad...i..." you didn't know how to break it to the poor guy "These ruins are just, too small for me, I need to be able to stretch out my wings and fly, not be caged up" his smile dropped as he looked at you with a frown

"...you want to leave." he turned off the stove and walked closer to you, gripping your shoulder painfully "You will not leave me, you will not end up like the others leaving me alone here"

"D-dad let go your hurting my shoulder" he seemed to only grip tighter, the crazy look on his face you know means trouble

"Why must you leave? everything is perfect here. you have no need to leave me. stay forever and ever and ever!" he starts laughing, his claws digging into your shoulder

"I-im not leaving f-forever!! im, not a weak little girl. I just wanna explore then I'll come back" you put your hand over the one gripping your shoulder "I would never leave you alone Dad, I don't want to see you in suffering of being alone anymore" your words seem to reach him as his smile drops and tears form in his eyes, he pulls you into a hug and cry as you pat his back

"I just. I don't want you to die like the others, your the first one to ever stay with me so long, get to know me and understand me." he was sobbing a lot, which was wetting your shirt but you didn't mind it "I really can't let you leave, I can't let you down for i don't think I have the strength to will myself to let you." you sighed, knowing what you must do then "Im sorry my child I really am." you lean back away from the hug and smile at him

"Hey now don't be like that, where's my insane goat dad?" he laughs a little and stands up, clearing his throat

"Your right, now I should get back to dinner seeing as its now cold and I have to warm it back up. it'll take awhile" you nod and leave the kitchen, going over to the locks. you take out your lockpick kit and you pick all the locks, quietly putting them down before putting it away and sneaking down. you know he's gonna hate you for doing this but you must, you must explore what there is to offer you in this new place, even if you can never go back. you hurry down the stairs and to the door, hearing Asgore's voice calling for you. you push it open with a lot of effort and close it behind you. you shivered feeling cold, you stuck on your hoodie and looked back at the door sadly. you breathe in and walk forward, a smile tugging at your lips as to what could be ahead

it was colder than expected, you wished you brought something thicker than just a hoodie. you stepped over a stick and walked forward before hearing it snap. you turned around and saw it broken, you were filled with a mixture of fear and excitement, wondering what the hell broke that stick. you walked forward, you heard footsteps and started to walk faster, and faster till you were running, but you skidded to a stop seeing the bridge was out. you could probably get over by jumping but there's still a high chance it could kill you. you tried moving but couldn't as if frozen in place. you felt a figure walk up behind you, obviously way taller, with a smell of smoke

 **"H U M A N. T U R N A R O U N D, I T'S R U D E T O N O T G R E E T A N E W P A L"** you felt your body turn around, you looked up at the tall figure, face oddly not visible with his hood up, and boney hand held out to you. you slowly reached up and grabbed his hand. you felt a shock and quickly let go

 **"BUZZER IN THE HAND TRICK, ALWAYS FUNNY."** he pulled back his hood to show he was, in fact, a skeleton, he took a long drag of his cigarette before dropping it to the ground and stomping it out with his foot **"SO** YOU'RE **A HUMAN HUH? COOL. NOW IM SUPPOSED TO BE HUNTING FOR HUMANS SINCE M'LORD IS A HUMAN HUNTING FANATIC, EVER HEARD OF HIM? HE'S CAPTAIN OF THE ROYAL GUARD."** you gulped, imagining meeting him. he sounded dangerous, and could kill you. but maybe you could escape from him, he could be not that smart if you're lucky!

 **"WELP. IM NOT TOO INTO IT, BUT IF I BRING YOU TO HIM IM SURE HE'LL BE HAPPY WITH ME. MAYBE I GET AN EXTRA PORTION OF FOOD FOR BRINGING YOU"** he was already drooling a bit thinking about it. you back up, making a dash for the right but he catches you by your hood and picks you up with ease

 **"SORRY KIDDO, CAN'T LETCHA DO THAT"** he takes a step forward and suddenly you're on the other side, you stare confused on what just happened and all he did was a wink and say 'its a shortcut'. he takes you over to his station and drops you down behind a lamp that you could be obviously seen from **"HERE COMES M'LORD"** you hear footsteps and the sound of a loud voice yelling out

"PAPYRUS!!"

**"YES M'LORD?"**

"You're slacking again aren't you!"

**"NO M'LORD, IM DOING MY ROUNDS LIKE YOU WANTED"**

"Bullshit! I know you weren't, do I have to teach you to not disobey me and follow my orders on when I say do your rounds to look for humans DO IT!!"

 **"BUT M'LORD I FOUND ONE LIKE YOU WANTED"** the smaller skeleton goes quiet before a big smirk on his face appears

"Really? you found a human?" Papyrus nods with a smile "okay, where is this 'human' if your not lying to me" he points over to the lamp that your barely hiding behind, The smaller skeleton walks over and breaks the lamp. you turn and stare him in the eye as he laughs

"Good job! for once your not a total failure, you'll get an extra helping of food for the next week" papyrus looks overjoyed at the fact he's getting more food

 **"THANK YOU SANS- I MEAN M'LORD"** sans lifts a hand and summons a bone, he raises it in the air and hits you across the head with it knocking you out.

* * *

when you awoke you saw your bag was gone from your back, and you were somewhere that seemed to be a shed. you looked around and saw blood and dust on the floor, you tried getting up, or maybe moving your arms well but they were chained down, there was enough chain for you to move your arms a fairish distance but not too far. you huffed and smiled, shimming up as far as the chains at your ankles will let you and you take the mini lockpick kit from your breasts, you knew this would come in handy. you carefully take it and you pick the locks on all your chains, putting the kit away quickly and deciding to wait. not bothering to leave oh no, you want to screw with the guy who knocked you out.

an hour or so passed when you heard the shed door unlock and open, sans walked in, looking ready to see your suffering whimpering face as you begged him not to hurt you, he didn't expect you to be out of your chains and to be sitting casually, checking your nails as you looked up at him through the bangs of your blue hair

"Oh im sorry, were those chains supposed to hold me? should get better quality ones then" he seemed to growl in anger at both your sass and the fact you escaped the chains but made no move to escape

"Aww, are you mad? how cute is the little kitten gonna bite because I escaped" he threw a bone at you which you leaned out of the way of, laughing at the fact your really getting this guy mad. you probably shouldn't as this guy could kill you. but he just looked so easy to tease, and you wanted some sort of revenge for getting hit in the head. which oddly doesn't hurt.

he growls louder at your sass and he summons another bone to smack you in the head with, you quickly stood up and grab it mid-swing "Nu-uh, ain't falling for that one again." now that you were standing you realized...you were taller than this guy, which is a shocker. he came up to only your nose which you thought was adorable, despite this guy wanting to kill you.

"...aww your so tin-" you were cut off by him punching you in the gut with his free hand, and smacking you upside the head with his bone, not knocking you out but stunning you enough for him to put the chains back on, this time using the spiked ones so they hurt her wrists if she dares rip them off. he kicked her a few times and ground his heel into her stomach, wanting her to beg for mercy. which would never come. you instead look up at him with a big smirk on your face 

"Wow, you're kinky, didn't think you were into that kind of stuff" his face flushed a little as she ground harder at your gut, making you wince in pain. he steps back and stops out, slamming the door behind him.

you laughed as soon as he left, getting such a reaction outta him was fun and exhilarating. who knew such a cruel looking guy could be so adorable when he blushes. you can't wait to mess with him more, as soon as you can get the mini kit out again and pick these locks

* * *

 

Sans, on the other hand, was furious. how dare a human not cower at his greatness! he was a terrifying monster, and captain of the royal guard! he took down Alphys for god sakes! yet this human dares escape his chains, call him kinky, AND sass him. he otta kill that girl right then and there! but. he does admit he likes a prey with sass and fight, she's a very interesting human indeed. so he won't give her up to the queen, not yet, not till he sees her face crying, begging for him not to hurt her anymore, praying that she'll be let go and that she'll get mercy. he smiled imagining that, but he must do his duty and recalibrate his traps, tomorrow though, he's gonna go down there and he's not letting that human sass him. he'll have his tools and we'll see who's really the last one laughing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading chapter two! and thank you to the comment that your liking the story so far, I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well!
> 
> and I really think swapfell asgore is just a crazy misunderstood lonely guy that just needs someone to see the gentleness under the crazy,
> 
> and of course, everyone need as sass reader


	3. The Greatest plan in the existence of plants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your shed isnt cozy, nor are you very warm. but the thoughts of sans angry face at your sass is enough to keep you warm to sass another day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am on a writing spree! the kudos and comments encourage me to keep going! keep writing! and not forget it like any other time I write a story!!

you had undone the locks on your chains and was sleeping through the night, you were always a light sleeper and heard the sound of crunching snow from outside. you sat up and leaned on your hand, expecting sans. but when the door opened it was papyrus. he seemed to be sucking on a lollipop as he closed the door behind him and walked over

 **"SUP KIDDO, HOW YA DOIN'? HEARD YOU MADE M'LORD MAD"** you shrugged

"Im dead inside and sleeping in a shed, so there are nothing really sup with me" you did chuckle at the fact he was so angry about your kinky comment.

**"SO...WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HIM TO MAKE HIM SO ANGRY?"**

"He chained me up and stomped on my stomach, so I called him kinky" paps seemed to nearly choking on his lollipop after hearing that

 **"YOU CALLED HIM KINKY...?"** he burst out laughing, arms wrapped around his middle **"THAT'S HILARIOUS! IVE NEVER HEARD A HUMAN DARE CALL HIM KINKY. THEY USUALLY COWER IN FEAR AND BEG NOT TO BE KILLED"**

"Well then he must be disappointed, I don't roll like that. I've seen much scarier than that tiny kitten. and he'll never make me beg, I ain't a dog and I refuse pet play" that seems to make him laugh harder, he wheezed from laughter. which confused you as to why he's even breathing if he's a skeleton

**"THATS HILARIOUS, I LIKE YOU KID, YOU GOT SPUNK. AND WITH SUCH A STRONG FRONT LIKE YOURS I DON'T THINK HE'S GONNA GIVE YOU UP SO SOON, NOT TILL HE SEES YOU CRY"**

"the day I cry at him is the day pigs fly" you didn't notice the door being opened again

"So you won't cry huh?" you heard the venom in his voice, Paps froze up and was shaking "Papyrus, what are you doing talking to the human?"

**"W-WELL I J-JUST WANTED TO-"**

"NO EXCUSES! get out and sit on the couch, you will get suitable punishment for coming down here later" papyrus whimpers a bit and runs out, slamming the door shut behind him

"Hello, Mister Kinky."

"THAT IS NOT MY NAME!! My name is the great and terrifying sans! and you will treat me with respect you piece of filth!!" he's up close and personal, jabbing you in the middle of your chest as he talks. you slap away his hand and stood up crossing your arms and sticking out your tongue like a brat

"Nope, your Mister Kinky. and you'll get respect from me oooohhh NEVER" he looked quite angry now as he punched you in the face making you stumble, he takes a bone and swipes at your legs making you fall, he pins down your limbs with crisscrossing bones as he smiles evilly

"Oh little human I bet your scared, go ahead, beg for mercy" he puts a hand where his ear would be, waiting expectantly

"Fuck you, I would rather lick a boot" his smile dropped as he kicked your side

"Fine, im fine with making you fear me the hard way" he hooks a whip from his side and he cracks it against a wall

"Oooh im sooo scaaarreeedd, a whip. what are you gonna do next, make me call you master? HA!" he hits you with it and you flinch at the pain, but don't stop sassing him. he's getting really sick and tired of your shit by now

"Since you are so rude and refuse to give me the respect I deserve, maybe I'll kill you right now!"

"Do it then, im dead inside so you might as well"

"Well, I might just do it!"

"Then do it!"

"I will!"

"Good!"

"Great!!"

_"FANTASTIC!!!"_

**_"FUCKING WONDERFUL!!!!"_ **

you both sit in silence for a moment, neither doing anything. he sighs and takes out a bone

"I won't kill you YET! I've yet to see your face cry~" he laughs and starts to hurt you, he cuts up your skin with some sharp ones, whips at you, even hits you multiple times yet you refuse to yield to him. he refuses to give up, he unsummons the bones holding her down and she sits up with a strain

"So Sir Asshole, ever plan on giving me my stuff back?" he glares at you and puts his foot on your chest, forcing you to the wall

"You will get nothing of yours back. we must go through it and search for anything that could be useful to us. I'll be a little merciful this time and not chain you up since your too weak to get up on your own" he laughs maniacally before putting his foot down and walking out.

you sigh and flop down, might as well get some rest before he comes back, gotta rest your sassing voice.

* * *

 

it has been about two weeks of torture, but you didn't budge. you would make comments about what he's doing, ask for your bag back, and joke around while he hurts you. it seems like you were doing everything in your power to NOT give him what he wants. Sans kicked open the door which made paps jump, he was shaking as he walked over and flopped down on the couch frustrated as hell. he ran his hand over his skull mumbling before yelling

"AUGH! that human is a bother! no matter what I do to her she refuses to give me what I want when I try to make her cry she instead comments how short I am. when I try to make her beg for mercy she instead sasses me! nothing is working on her and im running out of ideas" he hasn't gotten any progress with her, and it was starting to wear his patience thin.

**"WELL YOU COULD ALWAYS TRY SOMETHING PSYCHOLOGICAL"**

paps would often talk to you when sans was done giving you a beat down or before he does, and bring you food. he learned a bit about you. like your name, some things you like to you, and your favorite color. and he liked hearing what exactly she would tell him to make sans so mad

"What do you mean?"

**"WELL, I KNOW YOU'LL BE MAD BUT IVE BEEN TALKING TO THE HUMAN-"**

"PAPYRUS WHAT DID I-" paps held up a hand

 **"-AND IVE LEARNED. IF YOU CAN'T MAKE HER CRY THOUGH PHYSICAL PAIN, WHY NOT MENTAL? GET TO KNOW HER, FIND SOMETHING THAT WOULD BREAK HER AND BREAK HER. SHE'LL BE A SOBBING MESS AND YOU'LL GET WHAT YOU WANT"**  

Sans put a hand to his chin and thought about it, it WAS a good idea, breaking the human psychologically. it was the most devious and evil plan

"Good job, you'll be allowed to smoke three cigarettes during your shift" paps smiled widely at that, glad he did a good job. 

Sans was gonna plan this out the finest detail and make you trust him like you've never trusted anyone before so he can crush it.

* * *

 the next morning you heard footsteps, it's probably paps here to bring your food before you gotta deal with the asshole. the door opens, your faced away from it but you raise your hand up

"Morning Papyrus, brought my food huh?"

"I am not Papyrus! I will be taking over his feeding duties from now on" your groan, too tired for this, but you roll over and glare at him anyway as he sets a sandwich down next to you, you make no move to touch it though as he sits down not to far from you and stares

"...Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Eat! you're all wounded up so eat to heal you" his behavior is highly suspicious, after days of him wanting you to cry he's suddenly nice to you? you don't buy it one bit

"No."

"What do you mean no?"

"I mean NO, you could have drugged this, or put poison in it!"

"I may be the great and terrifying sans but I would NEVER do something so childish as put poison or drugs in food"

"Yeah, like I buy that" you roll back over and he clicks his tongue, which makes you question how the hell he made that noise. you hear him move, and soon felt yourself rolled back over and pinned under him

"Eat it you pathetic whelp!" he starts trying to jam it in your mouth, but you turn your head away, refusing to eat it "EAT. IT!" he grabs your face with his other hand and starts trying to jam it in your mouth, which you keep shut tight, you hear the door open and hear paps voice

 **"HEY ___, BROUGHT YOUR BREAK...FAST"** he stares at just the scene in front of him. he sighs and picks up sans taking him off you and setting him aside, he lifts you up into a proper sitting position and sets a new sandwich in your lap, which you eat without complaint. Sans has a shock/kinda angry look on his face as he crosses his arms in thought.

 **"SO, GUESSING M'LORD TRIED FORCE FEEING YOU"** you nod, mouth full of sandwich **"HEH, WELL AT LEAST YOUR EATING"** Sans stands off to the side, observing you two interact with each other, talking as if your buddies already. he was taking mental notes so he can use it later.

soon Paps leaves and it just leaves you and sans

"So..."

"So...?"

"I see you talk to my brother often, what do you converse about"

"Oh we convers a lot about nunya"

"What is nunya?"

"Nunya business" you snicker as he looks more frustrated than before

"Why must you be so stubborn!"

"Why must you be such an asshole?" he growled and stood up stomping out, he wanted to rip your little head off with how much you frustrated him. but he must restrain himself till he breaks you mentally. but first he must find out how paps gets along with them so easily

* * *

the next few days is Sans bringing you food, you refusing to eat, him trying to force it down your throat (Which he succeeded once), paps coming in with replacement food, and sans trying to get a conversation out of you like you have with paps

"So huma-"

"___. my name is ___. if your gonna bother doing a whole fake 'oh im so nice now' thing you might as well call me my name"

"Right, ___." he says like its the most disgusting word to ever come out of his mouth "Tell me about yourself"

"Well, im ___. im locked in a shed with a guy who I despise, and im deader than disco inside" you really hated this guy, you saw past his act, you knew what he was doing. he couldn't get you to cry so he's trying to be nice to you, let down your guard and let him in your heart so he can destroy you from the inside. well, that's not gonna work on you. try as he might he won't break you

"Well im gonna go recalibrate my traps since you want to be stubborn!" he gets up and leaves, his plan isn't working like how he planned it out. it was simple, bring you food, talk to you, you spill your life story, he finds something to exploit, uses it, you cry, he kills you, everyone happy. but noooooo your giving him problems, refusing to make actual conversation, refusing to eat what he brings, hell you refuse to even look at him! he needed another way to get you to open up to him...papyrus, if he talked to papyrus maybe he can weasel information from him, and use it against her. the perfect plan! it's an even better plan than the first plan! the greatest plan of all plans!

he confronts papyrus about this and he starts telling him everything she told her

 **"SHE TOLD ME A STORY ONCE ABOUT WHEN SHE WAS WORKING A DEAD END JOB. SHE WAS CHILLING IN THE BREAK ROOM AND TWO CO-WORKERS WERE TALKING ABOUT HER WITHOUT KNOWING SHE'S THERE. SO THEY CALLED HER A DUMB BLOND SINCE HER HAIR WAS APPARENTLY BLOND BEFORE BLUE, AND SHE TOLD THEM 'IF I WANTED TO KILL MYSELF I WOULD CLIMB YOUR EGO AND JUMP YOUR IQ'"** Sans turned his head away to smirk a little. so she isn't just fiesty here, she's a ball of sass everywhere, and blue suits her, it goes well with red like the blood she'll spill when he kills her. he chuckles about it darkly to himself, she's gonna be the greatest catch to destroy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter!
> 
> and you get along with da pap boi, since he didn't try to kill you, or try and make you cry. he a good dude, and its gonna take looonngg while for sans to break your shell
> 
> (This is also the last chapter for today, it kinda sucks but im tired)


	4. Poke the dog, and you get bit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poking the dog is all fun and games till he bites back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back at it with another chapter! which by now yall should know I have zero idea what the frig im doing, or if im even writing this guy right. but im doin' it anyway!!!

it's yet another day, this shed is practically your home now. your fed three times a day, sans comes down often to try an converse with you, only to leave in a huff when you don't give proper conversation. and why should you anyway? you have no need to talk to a guy who yells at you, kicks you, tries to force feed you, and bug you to hell and back. but the repetitiveness of it was starting to annoy you. same thing, same conversation, same reaction.

"Human!" you groan internally as you hear his grating voice "I have brought you breakfast, and you BETTER EAT IT THIS TIME!" his yells were giving you a headache. you sat up and took the food obediently eating it since you don't wanna hear him complain yet again about it. he smirked seeing you eat finally

"Mwehehe! I see you finally gave in and stopped resisting!" he looked so proud of himself that he's making progress

"No. I just didn't wanna hear your annoying voice screech about me not eating" his smile twitches at your response, but doesn't fall

"Now will you be a good human and follow my order of telling me how you are today" he's been getting conversation training so he could get through your stupidly thick shell

"Will you be a good monster and actually ask instead of demanding, or is your brain too small to do such a thing?" he takes that as a challenge and clears his throat

"Human _please_ tell me how your day is" he forces a nice smile on his face, hating to say such a word as 'please' to someone like you

"Much better, my day is fine, thank _you_. how is your day" you spit out like its poison in your system

"I am doing _wonderful_ , I recalibrated my traps and did five hours of training today but someone like you couldn't understand the great responsibility and fame I get for being the captain. im very very famous around here-"

and there he goes blabbing on. if there's one thing you learned about his constant visits is he's a giant narcissist. get him talking about himself and you won't need to say a word.

"and of course only I am the most responsible of all the royal guards which are why im captain." he seems to have remembered that this isn't all about him "Nice try you fiend! getting me to spill everything like the cunning shrew that you are, I won't fall for it! you won't learn anything about me"

you finished off the last bite of your food before leaning on your hand

"Well lets see, I learned your a jerk, your captain of the royal guard, you train a lot, you cook, you clean because you dislike a dirty place, your ego is higher then Mount Everest, you just looovvee talking about how you make your boney face 'shine', you torture people, you treat your brother like a dog, your a control freak, and last but not least. you hate socks on the floor. did I miss anything or did I get it all?" you say with as much hate in your voice as you can muster, while putting a kind smile on your face, he looked surprised at how you actually listened and had a good memory. he laughs darkly and grabs a hold of your chin, his fingers dug through the glove hurting your face

"Well, aren't you the smartie with such good memory! your right I do dislike dirt. and look around you" he makes your head turn to look at the filthy bloodstained, dust-covered chains, floors, and walls. "and since you have nothing better to you, your gonna clean it!"

oh hell no

"Oh hell no." you refused to do that, you are not gonna be this guys maid

"Oh hell yes. because if you don't you'll be punished severely!" you breath in, and then blew a razzberry in his face. coating it with a lot of spit. he opens his eyes at you and one socket went dark while the other glowed brightly. you've never seen that happen before, so you really felt like you screwed up. he grabs you by the throat and slams you into the wall, a crazed look on his face as he summoned a sharpened bone to aim at your neck as you struggled to breath

"You think you can just deny me, and spit in my face without expecting retaliation? such a stupid human." he squeezes tighter, taking the bone and pressing it into your shoulder. the pain from your shoulder felt heightened as you were starting to black out. but just before you do he shoves the bone farther and then let's go, causing you to gasp and cough as you flop to your knees.

"Now what have we learned today human~?" you couldn't answer, you kept coughing and this seemed to please him "Can't speak? such a shame. look how weak and frail you are human." he grabs you by the hair and tugs you up to look at him "So weak, you can't even defend yourself! pathetic" he kept taunting you, calling you weak, pathetic, useless. you growled and grabbed the bone in your shoulder, you ripped it out and hit him across the face with it, causing him to rip quite a few strands of hair from your head and fall over on his side. you stood up bone in hand looking at him pissed. he turned to look at you, anger on his face as well as you see a crack from where you hit him

"I am NOT weak! I can be as strong as anyone else! you're the weak one, you pick on the ones weaker then you to satisfy your own emptiness inside because you can't feel anything other than sick, disgusting rage, and sadism. next time to call me weak, take a look in the god damned mirror you stupid science lab skeleton!"

your words seemed to anger him more as he stood up and grabbed your soul with blue magic, smacking you to the wall. he summons multiple bones aimed at you, a crazy smile on his face. you squeeze your eyes shut for the death that waits for you...but nothing happens. carefully open your eyes to see a wall of bones protecting you, the blue magic on your soul is dropped, and through the crack of two bones next to each other you can see paps holding back sans as he violently thrashes against his hold 

**"M-M'LORD! CALM DOWN! REMEMBER THE PLAN, KILLING HER NOW IS NOT PART OF THE PLAN"**

sans is in a blind rage, paps slowly start taking him out of the shed as you relax. that was the most adrenaline causing, blood pumping thing you've done yet. but now that its over, you feel drained and tired, probably from your shoulder bleeding so much. you slump down and put your hand over the hole in your shoulder, slowly drifting off with how tired you are

* * *

 

Sans. was. pissed. he never had ever met someone that had to GALL to dare hit him in the face with his own bone, and tell him off. once paps dragged him out he let go of sans, making sure to block the door

 **"ARE YOU OKAY M'LORD? YOU WENT CRAZY DOWN THERE."** Sans just looked up at him with a glare and hit him across the head with a bone

"Why did you interrupt me!! I was that close to killing the girl for the insulting things she said!" paps didn't move despite the hit, it was painful but nothing he can't manage

" **M'LORD, WHAT ABOUT YOUR PLAN?"**

"Screw the plan! move out of the way so I can kill her!" paps didn't budge though. he squinted his eyes at him "I. said. move" paps returned his look with one of his own

**"M'LORD...AS MUCH AS I AM FOR HELPING YOU HUNT HUMANS SO WE CAN BE FREE, CAN'T WE JUST KEEP THIS ONE? LIKE A HUMAN SLAVE. WE COULD TRAIN HER AND MAKE HER DO AS WE WANT, AND ITS A SHAME TO KILL SOMEONE WITH SUCH A SOUL WITH ONLY 1 LV, UNLIKE THE OTHERS"**

"No way! that thing is not gonna be our slave, she could assault us when our guard is down!"

**"BUT M'LORD-!"**

"END OF DISCUSSION!"

he stomps off, glaring at the bit of blue hair that's still clenched in his fist. papyrus sighs, knowing its gonna take a lot of convincing to let him make you practically a human pet. he just couldn't let such a sweet soul like yours die in this world of harshness and despair, you were really fun to talk to, and hear about the surface despite not getting to see he opened the door back up into the shed and saw you on the ground bleeding. he hurried over and pressed his hands to the wound, his hands glow green as he starts healing her.

he's glad he caught her just before she died. the wound heals up nicely but there's still a lot of blood on you, he teleports back to the house and looks for a new shirt you could wear. but all his are dirty since he doesn't bother washing them 90% of the time. he opens his door a little and sees sans on the couch watching NTT. he sneaks by to sans room and steals a shirt he knows sans won't miss from his drawer before teleporting back. he swaps your blood covered shirt for this new one, using the stained ruined one to clean off the leftover blood on you before slipping the new one on you. he did spot something odd sticking out from the side of your bra, but he assumed it was a part of the bra its self so he ignored it.

he stood up and sighed. this was gonna be hard to convince sans, but he had to try. since who knows, maybe she could be a good influence on him if they got along

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shorter chapter I think, but I Hope you enjoyed the chapter, and if you didn't? oh well!


	5. Obey the master

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bark bark woof. bark woof bow wow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's chapter is a mostly Papyrus/Sans view chapter! well more like sorta half but OH WELL
> 
> and i sorta have an idea for how this is gonna go. its gonna take awhile since both of them hate each otherrrr

Papyrus would ask single day if he could keep you as a slave, or even a pet. which sans would always tell him no. he started keeping an eye on sans since he decided to go back to his old idea of torturing you. but he was making sure to remove him from the shed before he kills you, which would end up in an argument between them. he tried using points that seemed logical, or smart, so it would seem like a great idea, but it's like nothing is getting through to him. he was thinking of giving up on convincing him soon, but its like he hasn't thrown all the cards on the table just yet. there's something wrong he's saying that's not hitting the points he likes, something that would make him want to do it. what exactly that is is on the tip of his tongue, but he just doesn't know it. he stood up from his spot on the couch, sans should be in the shed by now torturing you.

he went over to the shed and saw the usual sight, you resisting crying out in pain, or crying at all, sans talking about how weak and pathetic you are while hurting you, the typically normal sight for this tall skeleton. he watched from the sidelines ad you argued with him as he hurt you, a smile of glee on sans face. then it hit him. Sans sadism! he wants to make you suffer, cry, and rue the day you ever came down here. he started formulating a plan of what to say to him when he heard a ringing noise. sans stopped and took his phone from his pocket, turning off the alarm

"Papyrus! its time for our rounds. we'll come back to torture the human again later" you sighed glad its over. sans grabbed paps wrist and dragged him out of the shed and onto the usual path for patrol.

**"M'LORD... PERMISSION TO SPEAK ABOUT THE HUMAN?"**

"Permission denied"

 **"BUT, ITS A REALLY GOOD IDEA FOR MAKING HER CRY"** sans seems to think about it for a moment before nodding

"Very well, permission granted. what is this idea of yours?"

 **"LET'S MAKE HER OUR PET!"** sans growls a bit, looking up at him with an angry face

"I thought we were over this subject."

 **"BUT M'LORD, DON'T YOU REALIZE, IF WE MAKE HER OUR PET, YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT TO HER! YOU CAN FORCE HER TO CLEAN, FORCE HER TO DO DANGEROUS THINGS FOR YOUR AMUSEMENT, AND WITH ENOUGH TRAINING YOU COULD TRAIN HER TO HARM HERSELF!"** Sans starts thinking about it, it did sound like quite the tempting idea. making you suffer, clean impossible stains off the carpet, forcing you to do dangerous runs for items. it sounded perfectly devious

"You really want this human as a pet huh? tell me, why are you so attached to her? you never suggested a human pet with the other six souls we captured and made cry, so why now?"

 **"BECAUSE M'LORD, SHE'S A TOUGH COOKIE. IF WE BREAK HER WITH LABOR, WE CAN MAKE HER CRY REALLY EASY!"** Sans smiled a big evil grin

"Very well. we'll keep the human as a pet-" paps mentally celebrated, till sans raised a hand and he continued "-But you'll have to train her to be obedient enough to listen to my orders. you have one week to do so or we kill her right then and there"

paps nods, this was perfect! you would die, he would have someone to talk to about the surface, and they get a new pet. maybe he can even make them clean his room. he was ecstatic, while Sans was planning what sort of evil work he can make you do to force that tough shell of yours to break down till your nothing but an easy target. he crossed his arms thinking of exactly how he'll make you cry, and perhaps that he should have agreed to the pet thing sooner

* * *

Paps may think this isn't so perfect anymore. he was down in the shed with a clipboard and you refused to cooperate for hours now. just mentioning that you needed pet training seemed to tick you off so much that your not even trying to be a good pet and listen

 **"COME ON, IF YOU DON'T FOLLOW ORDERS YOU'RE GONNA BE HURT"** you turned with a huff and this was starting to annoy him **"OKAY LOOK, ITS EITHER TRY AND LISTEN, OR MY BROTHER FEEDS YOU DO THE DOGS, AND THEY ARE VERY BIG DOGS"**

"Bite me."

 **"I WON'T BUT THE DOGS WILL"** you mumbled a couple curse words under your breath before sighing

"Fine! fine, fine, fine, fine. what do you want me to do"

 **"JUST FOLLOW SIMPLE COMMANDS FOR NOW OKAY?"** you nod, simple commands are easy enough **"OKAY, SIT."** you...did nothing, you just looked at him with a look of 'dude, really?' **"DID YOU NOT HEAR ME?"**

"No, I heard you, but are you seriously giving me commands, for a dog?"

**"HOW ELSE AM I GONNA TRAIN YOU? YOUR GONNA BE A PET? SO YOU MUST ACT LIKE ONE"**

"How about, fuck no. im, not a dog" this was just plain frustrating now, you seemed to purposely refuse any orders, commands, or directions. it's like your some bad kid that needs punishment "So this 'pet' thing will stop the stupid torture right?"

**"AND GET YOU OUT OF THE SHED, YOU WOULD BE IN THE HOUSE WITH ME AND SANS"**

"Okay, and I just need to follow simple orders the tiny asshole gives me right?"

**"CORRECT."**

"Fine, I'll do it. call your stupid brother and let's get this over with." he teleported out, leaving you with just your thoughts

* * *

 you had been sitting patiently for a while now, awaiting Paps to bring Sans and get the stupid pet test over with. soon the door opened and sans walked in with papyrus trailing behind 

"So she's well behaved now correct?"

 **"YES M'LORD!"** Sans stares you down before crossing his arms 

"Stand." You get up from your spot on the floor

"Walk in three circles, touch your toes, then your head, and bark like a dog" you begrudgingly did the actions, despite how stupid you look. both sans and papyrus are getting a kick outta seeing you act like an idiot

"Bark." Sans seemed pleased to see you behaving with a scowl on your face. he walks over and clips something around your neck, it was a dog collar with a name tag that said 'Human. property of the skeleton brothers' on it. "What the fuck is this?"

"Your collar, since your our pet we need to show that you will not be touched by anyone but us without permission. now dog, I order you to scrub off all the blood and dust from these floors and chains. I'll be bringing in a capture and I need a clean space to do so. you have one hour or you'll be punished" he snapped his fingers and papyrus vanished for a second only to come back with a bucket, scrub brush, broom, and a dustpan. he put them down on the floor and sans pointed to it 

"Now get scrubbing Mutt," you mumbled some rude comments before grabbing the bucket and starting to scrub these floors. sans is watching in amusement as you struggle to scrub the dried blood off the stone floor.

Sans goes to the door, glancing back to see you curse under your breath. if he gets reactions like that all the time? then he's gonna have a great time with a human slave. and with that, he leaves to go get the new prisoner to torture.

* * *

you had no idea HOW your gonna clean this stupid stain off, this scrubber isn't even working. papyrus left you alone to focus and you have no idea how much time you have left before that bastard comes back. the dust was easy, just sweep it into a pile and trash it, and you got most of the blood off the floors and chains, there's just this annoying stain you can't clean off. you looked over at the large pile of chains you cleaned off and decided to do the laziest thing, push the chains over the stain. no one will notice if no one sees it right? right.

just as you finished pushing them over, the door slams open and a dog monster is thrown in next to you. the dog is whimpering as sans comes down, whip in hand

"How many times must you be punished before you know you're not allowed to smoke dog treats on the job!" he's about to whip him when he notices you "...did you just finish cleaning up? oh, my Toriel. you're slow, and you call this a proper cleaning? I can still see all the dirt" he huffs "you get a C- acceptable for now but next time if it isn't at least B quality you'll be punished. now go wait outside mutt, papyrus will be here soon" the dog monster tries crawling away, but sans whips him in the back, stopping him.  you decide to just walk out, feeling bad for the poor guy but what can you do? last time you hit sans back you almost died

you keep a blank look on your face as you walk through the doors, not letting it change till after its closed then its a worried look for the poor dog. you can hear his whimpers and barks from here. you didn't even notice paps right next to you till he tugged at your collar, which you promptly slapped his hand and got into a fighting stance reflexively 

 **"HEH, DON'T WORRY IM NOT GONNA HURT YOU, JUST GONNA BRING YOU HOME DOG"** welp, you assume dog is your new nickname here. grrrreeeaaaattt. "YOU'LL BE LIVING IN THAT BUILDING FROM NOW ON" he points to the home next to the shed, you thought it looked pretty nice, observing the details. which you weren't allowed a long time to do as he grabs you by the collar and drags you off to the building. 

he opens the door and inside is just as nice as the outside. it had a pleasant homey feel to it.

 **"HERE'S YOUR BED!"** he walks over to a dog bed with a bowl of water and a bowl for food next to it. you give him the biggest frown you have ever given someone, it actually kinda hurts a bit.

"Okay I get the 'pet' thing, but I refuse to be treated like a dog, im a person! im too big for something like that" paps seems to enjoy your reaction to the doggy bed 

 **"SORRY PUP, ONLY BED WE GOT. BUT HERE'S A BLANKET"** he grabs a blanket from the couch and gives it to you

"Why can't I sleep on the couch?" the door kicks open and sans has quite a few blood stains on him 

"Because mutts aren't allowed on the furniture!" you glare at him as he chuckles "But if your a good girl maybe I'll let you sit with us on the couch" he says in in the most patronizing voice as he roughly pats your head. you slap his hand away and sit down on the dog bed with quite the angry look

**"AWW THE PUP'S MAD"**

"She won't even snap back at us, guess she finally learned her place" you ground your teeth before speaking

"Hey, both of you. did you hear that?!" they both look around going silent "Its the sound of two annoying pieces of shit shutting up for five fucking seconds!!" they both look back at you, sans looking angry, but smiling at the same time 

"Guess the Mutt needs punishment" he picks you up with ease, putting you on his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. he walks over to the door, opens it, and throws you outside. you faceplant into the snow and shiver intensely as you look back at them "I'll open it back up in five minutes, maybe ten~" you get up and run back over to the house, but he closes it before you could enter. you bang on the door before screaming out

"YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES!!" you were shivering as you waited outside, you can hear sans laughter through the door. you were gonna get back at him for this. you will get revenge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the chapter! seeing that people actually bother to read my story gives me the heart to keep going! see yall next chapter!!


	6. Revenge is a dish best served spicy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time for some revenge, and what better time to do it when no ones around

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a short chapter today, i'll make the next one longer!

it was morning, or well you assumed it was morning with how much yelling Sans is doing to get papyrus up. time down here is very strange. you were curled up, your head on the doggy bed and the blanket given to you wrapped around yourself. you felt something nudge you once. when you didn't respond it turned into a sharp kick which caused you to sit up and glare at whoever kicked you. of course, it's sans who did it

"Mutt! get up you have work to do." you begrudgingly get up, too tired to particularly argue "Good, now listen up for I will not repeat myself! I will be heading out to Alphyses place for training, you will do what I usually do since I will be gone, you must clean all the laundry, sweep the floors, clean the kitchen counters, all the dirty dishes, and make dinner. got it?"

"Yeah yeah, clean the house, clean clothes, make dinner. gotcha" you were tired and you were only half listening, but you got the basic gist of what needed to be done

"Alright, oh and if I see slacking work you'll be put outside for 30 minutes" that's all he said before walking out the front door and slamming it shut. you really really hated that guy, and you wish you had at least tried to listen to Temmie and left, Or just stayed with asgore, maybe then you wouldn't be dealing with Mister asshole and his brother sir laze a lot. and speaking of his brother, you didn't see him around.

you went over to the downstairs closet to grab cleaning supplies and saw...well papyrus on top of all the cleaning supplies. just great. you sighed and grabbed his wrist trying to tug him off, but it was like he weighed a ton! a skele-ton. you mentally laughed at your own dumb pun as you kept trying to tug him off

"Hey...hey!...HEY!!" you screamed in his ear and all he did was open a single eyesocket to look at you

**"YES? DO YOU NEED SOMETHIN'? KINDA IN THE MIDDLE OF A NAP HERE"**

"Yeah, a nap on all the cleaning stuff. if your gonna sleep do it on the couch" paps just chuckles and digs under himself, taking out a broom and giving it to you

 **"THERE, THE REST OF THE STUFF YOU NEED IS IN THE KITCHEN, NOW IF YOU EXCUSE ME"** he grabs the door handle and closes the closet door. you hear snoring and just sigh deciding to get to work.

it was easy, up till laundry. five bags of laundry, FIVE BAGS!! do these guys not clean their clothes often? and gosh the gross stains on paps clothes was revolting. you could have sworn one of his shirts moved on its own, you were glad the easy part was telling the clothes apart. Sans's looked smaller while paps looked like things you could wear as a dress. you couldn't help but aww at how stupidly cute Sans's clothes are. one shirt says 'Bad to the bone' with a cartoony skull and bones on it, it was positively adorable. now if only the person who wears these clothes was cute.

soon it was time to make dinner, and about 70% of the food in there was tacos or spaghetti. you even looked in the fridge and found weird taco spaghetti, which you promptly threw away since it looked old and gross. you found a couple things and decided to make something simple. chicken and rice with...well what you assume looks like chicken, and something you assume is rice, or at least something close. as you cooked you were looking for seasoning and found something, hot sauce. you took it down and put a drop on your finger, tasting it. as soon as it touched your tongue you quickly put it down and started drinking some tap water. it was horrifyingly spicy....perfect~  
you were plating the food when you hear the door slam open. you peeked out from the kitchen to see sans walk in, looking a but scraped but nothing bad. he looked around seeing the place nice and clean, he saw you from the corner of his eye and marched over

"I assume dinner is ready?"

"Yup. though you should really get more diverse ingredients then stuff for tacos or spaghetti." he rolled his eyes at you and looked around before screaming out

"PAPYRUS! GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE DINNER IS READY!!" the closet door flys open and paps falls out of it, face-planting to the floor. he quickly gets up and hurries over, taking a seat at the table. sans also takes a seat and they both look down at the food before staring at you "And what is this?"

"Chicken and rice...I think, just eat it" papyrus scooped up some and put it in his mouth. he stopped a moment before starting to gobble it up.

sans looked down at his food and scooped some up himself, he put it in his mouth and if he had eyes, they would have bugged out. you gave your sweetest, most innocent smile

"Whats wrong? can't handle a little rice and chicken~?" if looks could kill, you would be dead with how bad he's glaring. tears are at the edge of his eye sockets

"No, its perfectly fine, the Great and Terrifying Sans can handle anything!" he forces down the food, trying not to screech out from how spicy it is "Get me a drink Mutt"

"Of course." you get him a cup of water, but put in a lot of hot sauce and mix it around. as soon as it's within his reach he grabs up and gulps it all down, soon regretting that. he wheezes and stands up before racing to the sink, pushing you out of the way and gulping down a lot of water till satisfied. you laugh and he growls and looks at you as you look as if you haven't done a single thing wrong in your entire life

**"ARE YOU OKAY M'LORD?"**

"Im fine! just thirsty" he was gonna get even with you now. he grabs you by the collar of your shirt and tugs you down so he can whisper in your ear "Your gonna regret that Mutt" he lets go and stomps off to his room. you don't regret what you've done, in fact, you want to torment him more. you have very valid reason to too, and besides. whoever said Revenge had to be a dish served cold?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed this short chapter, see yall next chapter!


	7. Petty pranks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans is getting revenge for that hot sauce thing you pulled yesterday, but your not going down without a fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyy! back with another chapter! hope yall enjoy it!

you may regret doing what you did yesterday a bit. you felt something on your nose, it bugged you intensely so you tried smacking it, and ended up with a face full of cream and sans laughter as he ran off. you wipe away the cream from your face. oh, this is war now. 

you get up and grab a bucket from the closet, and some water. you see sans door is open a little so you grab a stool and stand on it, setting the bucket up there before hurrying downstairs as quiet as you can. as soon as you reach the bottom you head a splash of water and the sound of a bucket hitting something. you turn around and see sans with is hand on the doorknob, a bucket on his head, and soaked with water. you laughed at the sight, that'll teach him for doing such a petty prank. your laughter was cut short when the bucket was chucked at your face, you screeched a bit in pain and glared at him, you both were having an intense glare off till he stomped down the stairs 

"Very funny. you think your clever doing such a petty thing as a bucket over the door prank"

"Me? petty?? your the petty one, you put whipped cream on my hand and made me smack it to my face!"

"That's not being petty, that's justified revenge" he crossed his arms in a huff

"and so is the water, its justified revenge"

"Well then guess I'll also be getting revenge again"

"Great! that just means I can do it right back"

"Are you challenging me?"

"Maybe I am!" you were both growling now as paps came into the room, looking at you both as if you were two rabid dogs at a standoff. you both huff and turn away, sans moving to sit on the couch, and you going off to the kitchen to go clean the dishes, leaving a confused papyrus standing there wondering what the heck happened

* * *

 the next prank was while you were cleaning the dishes. you were scrubbing a particularly tough burnt on piece of food. you were so focused on it you didn't notice sans at the doorway, or the blue hue surrounding your ankles till you felt a tug backwards, you dropped the pot in the sink, water splashing up and making you wet as you gripped the edge for dear life, you turned and glared at him as he started walking off with a laugh.

you opened the fridge and grabbed a kinda container of spaghetti. you lifted up the lid a bit and was hit with a bad smell, yup this has gone bad. **Perfect**

you hid the container as you saw sans watching NTT on the Tv. you walk over a fake look of guilt on your face

"Hey, I wanna say im sorry. it was mean of a pet to pour water on your head, and I have a gift for you as a sorry" he stares at you with suspicion but holds out his hand for your gift. you take off the lid from on top of the container and dump it on his head.

"Oopsie~ did I do that?" you chuckled as sans stood up, shaking with anger as he tackles you to the ground, you two start fist fighting/wrestling, spaghetti getting all over you both as you fought. papyrus came downstairs from his room and saw you both fighting with each other, he sighs and walks over, using blue magic on you both, causing you two to stop and thunk to the ground, struggling to get back up

**"YOU TWO, STOP FIGHTING LIKE CHILDREN"** sans glares and growls before you both yell out

"HE STARTED IT"

"SHE STARTED IT!"

  **"M'LORD, I KNOW YOU'RE THE BOSS, AND I GOTTA LISTEN UP OR BE PUNISHED BUT WATCHING YOU TWO FIGHT LIKE TWO LITTLE KIDS FIGHTING OVER A CRAYON ITS JUST SOMETHING I CAN'T LET SLIDE, AND I AM STILL THE OLDER BROTHER. NOW SANS GO GET CLEANED UP,** **I'LL** **GET SOME FRESH CLOTHES AND PICK A PUNISHMENT FOR PUP"**  he releases sans and he just silently goes upstairs into the bathroom to take a shower **"AND AS FOR YOU LITTLE PUP, YOUR PUNISHMENT IS YOUR CLEANING MY ENTIRE ROOM. AFTER YOU GET CLEANED OF COURSE"** well that doesn't sound too bad, I mean how bad could paps room be?

* * *

 

You were wrong, so very very wrong. as soon as you got cleaned up you were escorted to pap's room with a bunch of cleaning supplies. you were optimistic that it isn't that bad at all, till you opened the door and saw the horror that is his room, a trash tornado, so much trash on the floor, mystery stains, clothes that look like it hasn't been cleaned in months. and the smell, oh god the smell. you wanted to puke from how horrible it smelled

**"YEAH, I HAVENT CLEANED THIS ROOM IN...WELL, A VERY LONG TIME"** he pats your head  **"GOOD LUCK, YOUR GONNA NEED IT"** he leaves downstairs, you take a bandanna and put it over your nose and mouth and grabbed the gloves and trash bags. you should start with the laundry first. 

you started picking up the clothes, trying not to gag when you see something gross on it. and there were so many clothes, you had no idea how someone could live in this kind of room. you hear snickering behind you, and you look to see sans laughing at you. he wasn't wearing his battle body like usual, he was wearing a casual shirt and pants. he actually looked surprisingly kinda handsome. of course, you'll never admit you just thought that as a scowl appears on your face

"What do you want assface?" he leans against the doorframe, watching as you put his brother's gross clothes in a trash bag

"Nothing. just wanna watch your punishment Mutt" you mumble a couple rude things as you keep cleaning, wanting to get this done as soon as possible.

sans on the other hand was quite enjoying the sight, you gagging at every gross object in the room, having to clean all of it. it was quite amusing. he does admit, you are pretty strong when your actually fighting, your punches did actually hurt. he'll never admit it to your face but you were pretty interesting, and he's a tad glad he didn't murder you as soon as he saw you, it was much more pleasurable watching you suffer having to clean and cook for them. though that doesn't mean he approves of the fact you defy him at every chance you can get. you're a dirty little defyer, and he kinda likes it. it makes you tougher than the rest, not a sniffling baby that could be killed by the wrong flick of the wrist. you were actually tough, and he liked how sassy and snappy you are. it fits in well in this world since showing weakness is a death sentence. he was so caught up in his thoughts he almost let himself be hit by a tossed dirty shirt

"If your gonna sit there at least do something, don't be a lazy wimp" his eye twitched at that, how dare she call him lazy? and a wimp!? he marches over and kicks you when you bent over to pick up some more clothes, you ended up face first in a shirt and screeched out at how disgusting it is

"You asswipe!" you pick up the shirt and throw it at him, which he catches and throws back, full force at your face which made you fall back on your butt. you growled at him and went back to cleaning, not bothering to deal with him right now, you'll just get back at him later maybe, but right now you needed to focus on cleaning this room so you can get outta here."

"Oh yeah, I wouldn't open the closet door if I were you" he smirks and walks away to his room, door slamming shut behind him. you go over to the closet and open it, then quickly shut it. you thought the room's smell was bad, but the closet was even worse! you heard laughter from here....that damn sans. 

* * *

 it took you hours but you finally finished this damn room. the bed was made and scrubbed down of all the stains. all the clothes were cleaned, folded, and put away. and that closet was cleaned so well you only smell a pleasant smell. heh, a plea _sans_ smell...you mentally scold yourself for making such a terrible pun, that was just awful. you hear the door open and paps looks around in amazement

"M'LORD, COME OVER HERE!" sans walks over and his non-existing brows shoot up seeing how clean his room his

"Huh, I guess you are useful for something." he walks inside and inspects the place "No foul smell, and everything crisp and clean. A- job." what?! this is totally an A+ room! you pout and cross your arms "Now, go and make dinner, we're hungry and just because you cleaned paps room doesn't mean you can slack on your other duties" you sighed and walked past them, making sure to whisper to sans

"You're an asshole and I hate you" he seems to laugh at that as you go downstairs to make dinner. your too lazy to make anything new so spaghetti it is. 

* * *

 

the rest of the time went by in a blur, and by the time you knew it, it was time to sleep. you were laying on the ground with your dog bed pillow and the thin blanket, trying your best to sleep. you heard something approaching you, so you did your best to fake being asleep 

"You awake mutt?..." oh great it was sans. you kept faking, waiting so you can catch him before he tries anything funny. you can sense how close he is to you, and you nearly jump from the oddly gentle touch of his fingertips tucking your hair behind your ear. you felt some hair being lifted up, and a snipping noise....this mother fucker just cut a patch of hair on your side off too short, now its gonna look weird! you heard his laughter as he stood up 

"Hope you like weird looking hair patch" you heard him walk away with his laughter filling the silence till he goes into his room, the door clicking closed. you sat up glaring at that door as you rubbed the part he cut. and here you thought he was actually gonna do something nice, that asshole. you'll get payback another day.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this chapter! each kudo and hit keeps me writing! see ya next chapter!


	8. Giftmas time and an unexpected visitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans seems to keep giving you reasons to hate him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for being gone so long, I got sick and It's hard to focus on writing, but im back at it! here to bring you more reader and Sans hating each other :D

you didn't think you could hate sans anymore then you did now, you were wrong. he's making you go shopping today which doesn't sound too bad. he had shoved a list into your hands

"Be back within 30 minutes or im not letting you inside" you left out the door, money, list, and bags to hold the stuff in on hand as you walked. this was actually kinda nice, no yelling, no sans, it was perfect. though in your bliss of being away for once you didn't notice the eyes of something in the darkness eyeing you as you walked. when you reached the store, of course, the lady eyed you suspiciously.  but as soon as you pulled out the money she stopped caring that you're a human. 

"So what a  human like you doing around here?" she leaned against the counter as you grabbed the things you need

"Just some shopping for sir asshole and his brother laze a lot" the lady laughs a bit

"Well i would be careful, the dogs love chewing on new prey" the dogs? well, dogs aren't TOO much a problem. you can surely climb up a tree and just wait there till they give up. you paid the lady the money and left telling her thank you, and to have a good day, she looked shocked at you saying thank you but she looked kinda happy. as you were walking home you heard a growl. you expected the dogs, what you didn't expect was an axe nearly cutting you. you whipped your head around to see multiple well...dogs, but standing on hind legs and with weapons.

"We smell weird smell"  
("This smell makes us wanna destroy!") all the dogs growled and started running at you. you bolted for it, not caring much about whatever falls out of your bag. you managed to put a good distance between you and them as you rushed over to the house and banged on the door 

"LET ME IN, LET ME IN, LET ME IN!!" the dogs are getting closer as you heard a voice

"Whats the password?" it's of course sans, and is he really doing this now?!

"ITS SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME INSIDE IM BEING CHASED BY DOGS!"

"That's not it~" you ground your teeth together 

"SANS IF YOU DO NOT LET ME IN RIGHT NOW IM THROWING THE MEAT AT THE DOGS SO THEY WILL LEAVE ME ALONE!" there was a silence on the other side, the dogs jump at you but before you get bit or attacked you're tugged inside. you hear the dogs slam against the door and whimper in pain.

"What a troublesome Mutt." you poked his chest plate

"YOU! didn't tell me there were dogs out there, BIG DANGEROUS DOGS!"

"Well, what did you expect, the Spanish Inquisition?"

"OF COU- wait, what? you mean the Adams family, the phrase is 'what did you expect the Adams family?'"

"No, I mean Spanish Inquisition, because no one expects them"

"Okay, gotta admit that was kinda funny. your still an asshole for not telling me though" she huff as he 'mwe hehehe's' at you as you walk to the kitchen to put stuff away. you were reaching to put away a sauce can, standing on your tippy toes when you felt a weight on your head, making you still 

"Papyrus..." you couldny look up but you knew dang well who it was since sans is shorter than you.

 **"SUP PUP, I HEARD YOU MET THE DOGS TODAY"** Yeah, after they were trying to kill you. you push away pap's head and put away the sauce can.

"Yeah, no one warned me the dogs were big, terrifying, and murderous." paps shrugs and opens up a window before taking out a cig and lighting it "Do you really have to smoke in here?" you wave your hand in front of your face to try and blow the smoke away

 **"YES I DO, M'LORD IS BUSY IN HIS ROOM SO IM FREE TO SMOKE IF I FEEL LIKE IT, THIS IS OUR HOME"** He puffs some right in your face, causing you to cough and glare at him **"WHAT, CAN'T HANDLE A LITTLE SMOKE?"**

you were gonna say something when you heard sans screeching voice "PAPYRUS! MY SKELETON BATTLE FIGURE BROKE. COME FIX IT!" Sans stomped into the kitchen, a skeletor action figure with his head missing. he glares at you and points "MUTT! this is a no smoking household!" you stare confused and looked down at your hand. there was a cig between your fingers

"W-wait thats not-"

"SILENCE! since you humans seem to also have this stupid addiction i must busy you so you feel no need to smoke." he shoves the toy into papyrus's hands before turning back to you. a scowl still on his face "You will polish my armor and shoes after dinner, now get out of the kitchen so i may cook" he practically shoves both of you out into the living room. you glare at Paprus as he sits down on the couch

"You ass! you planted that ciggarate on me." He chuckles

 **"NEHEHEH, YOU GOT ME. CAN'T HAVE M'LORD CATCHING ME SMOKING INSIDE, LAST TIME HE DID HE MADE ME DO TWENTY LAPS AROUND SNOWDIN FOREST. BE LUCKY HE'S GOING EASY ON YOU SINCE ITS YOUR FIRST OFFENCE"** you were gonna yell at him more, but was interupted by the sound of crashing and clanking.

"PAPYRUS! WHERE'S THE SAUCE!!"

 **"CABNET"** Papyrus only glanced over to the kitchen door as he fixes up the toy. the noises lasted awhile till it went silent...too silent. you carefully walked over to the doorway and peeked inside. you were surprised to see sans in a pink frilly apron with 'Kiss the evil cook' on it, with a picture of a kiss mark. you had to quickly move away from the doorway as to not laugh at what you just saw. it was just so odd and shocking to see sans in something...so not sans like, then again you've only ever seen him in black and red clothes, so it was really jaring seeing him in that.

"Papyrus, Mutt! get in here before i throw out your food!" You walk in and see paps already at the table, you glance back though the door and see nothing at the couch. you just shook your head and walked towards your seat till you were stopped by sans standing in front of you "And what do you think your doing? no pets on the furniture"

"What? well where else am i gonna eat?" Sans points to a dog bowl with your dinner in it "...you gotta be kidding me."

"Nope, you will eat on the floor till your punishment is over. now eat up so you can get to polishing my armor" you mumble some profanitys under your breath as you sit down where your food is

"Where's my fork?"

"Pets don't use forks, Pets use their mouths" you grind your teeth together a bit before crossing your arms in a small pout, you had so much hate for this guy in your heart that if you had the chance you would kill him. "Oh yeah papyrus! did you fix my battle figure?"

 **"YUP"** he slides over the figure, as if it was never broken. sans eyes turn to stars as he stares excitedly at it

"You've done an adiquet job. now i can get back to my battle plans!" he devours the food quickly before racing off to his room, a look of excitement on his face

 **"MY BRO'S THE COOLEST RIGHT?"** you rolled your eyes at that

"He's as cool as a documentary about sticks" He laughs at that

 **"YOU'LL CHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT THAT ONE DAY, I JUST KNOW IT."** you scoff. like that would ever happen **"OH YEAH PUP, IF YOU SEE THE INSIDE DECORATED DON'T BE ALARMED, GIFTMAS IS TOMORROW. THE ONE DAY A YEAR WHEN NO ONE'S KILLING EACH OTHER"** He lights another ciggaret and puffs it **"OH AND DON'T EAT THAT, I DON'T THINK A HUMAN CAN HANDLE SUCH AWFUL FOOD. JUST SKIP DINNER TILL TOMORROW, I'LL BE COOKING"** he stands up and takes both his plate and yours before dumping out the food and patting your head **"G'NIGHT PUP, TRY TO GET PLENTY OF REST BECAUSE SANS WILL BE WAKING UP VERY EARLY"** you stand up and follow behind him as he walks out, you turn the corner and he's gone. you sigh and flop on your spot on the floor, tugging up your blanket as you curl up. you slowly drift off to sleep.

* * *

you open your eyes and look around, your in a place full of nothingness. you stand up and start walking till you hear a voice "____." you look around wondering who's calling your name. "___." you hear it again then see a bright light which makes you close your eyes. when you open them your face to face with sans, his arms on either side of you, trapping you against the kitchen counter "___, think you can tease me and get away with it? Tsk tsk." he moves one hand to grab you by the chin, your heart thumping as you blush "And you should know, bad dogs get punished" he leans closer, his teeth almost touching your lips.

you then bolt up, sweating and blushing as you breath heavy. you look around and see your in your 'bed'. you run your fingers though your hair wondering why you had such a dream. it was a nightmare to you. you flop back down looking at the ceiling deep in thought. mostly in wonder why your brain thought up that, and if it was a nightmare or a dream, its hard to tell.

after an hour of laying there sans door kicked open "BROTHER WAKE UP, ITS GIFTMAS!!" he runs down the stairs and steps on your stomach as he runs by to the tree you don't remember being there, you actually don't remember the house being so nicely decorated. sans sat down next to the tree as papyrus walks down the stairs yawning, sans doesnt wait for him as he tears open his gift with more excitement then a child on christmas. "A NEW BATTLE FIGURE!! JUST WHAT I NEEDED!" he tears though several gifts, the gifts inside ranging from armor polish to new boots. the last gift he stares at curiously "Its...for the mutt?" he tosses it at you which you sit up and catch. you tear the wrapping to a box, you open it and find...a bone?

"Why is it a bone?" Sans starts laughing

"BECAUSE! Dogs munch on bones, and your a mutt" you take the bone and chuck it at his head. it makes a 'SQUEAK' noise as it bounces off his head "What? did you think i would give you a real bone after last time you hit me in the face with one? HA!" he laughs at your attempt, then seems to remember something "Oh yeah! you forgot to polish my armor yesterday. so your gonna polish it today with the new armor polish i got" he gets up and starts undoing the straps with little 'click' noises as he does so until all his armor is off. he drops it onto your lap which you werent expecting it to be so heavy. you were lucky it didnt break your leg. "Well? get to polishing!" he throws a rag in your face and starts messing with his new stuff. you sigh and start polishing his stuff, it didnt really need much ploshing besides his shoes. his shoes looked flithy, while his armor looked very well maintained, so you focused on his shoes till they were so clean they looked bran new. though it did strike you as odd that these were high heel boots. you chuck the stuff back to him which he catches easily. he inpects it before grining "A+ work for once-" you mentally fistpumped, till he continued "-then again thats only on the shoes, my armor is always well ploshed so only the shoes count" you sigh and flop.

then there was a loud banging on the door and sans eyelights go out as a voice screams out "SANS! OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR, BY ORDER OF THE KING!!" sans silently stands up and grabs you by the wrist forcing you to stand up as he drags you to his room. he kicks open his door and shoves you in his closet

"Now mutt, if you value your life you will keep 100% silent. at the door is Alphys, former head of the royal guard till i took her down a peg. and i refuse to let her kill you,-" that...was actually kinda sweet of sans to protect you "Beacuse im the one thats gonna do that." nevermind. still an ass. he closes the door and goes downstairs, you can't quite hear whats going on but in the back of your mind you hope everything will be okay.

* * *

Once he heard alphys at that door he barely knew what he was doing till he had already dragged you up to his room and shoved you in his closet. "Now mutt, if you value your life you will keep 100% silent. at the door is Alphys, former head of the royal guard till i took her down a peg. and i refuse to let her kill you,-" he didn't quite know why he was even protecting you anyway, and that spark of hope in your eyes caused a bad feeling in his nonexistant gut "Because I'm the one that's gonna do that." perfect reasoning. of course why else would he protect a useless, high pain tolerant, sassy, strong headed, good cook of a human besides the fact he wants to be the one to make you cry and to kill you. there's no other reason behind it. he closes the door and pushes his bookshelf over it before he heads downstairs. he puts back on his armor and the boots you ploshed and opens the door "What the fuck do you want Alphys? you know I'm busy during the first hours of giftmas" Alphys makes an angry face at him

"You know DAMN WELL why I'm here! I've gotten reports from dogamy and dogaressa that a human when inside your home. so I'm doing an inspection!" he sighs, now regretting sending you out to shop for his amusement.

"Fine! get your damn inpection over with. you know i wouldnt keep a human, i torture and KILL humans" she of course squints at him before walking in and checking around every nook and cranny for you. she even goes into Papyruses room, which she very quickly regrets doing. he follows her into his room which she checks everywhere for you

"Wait...you had a closet. where is your closet?" He crosses his arms

"I had the room renovated a bit, the closet was useless to me so i got rid of it." she goes up close to him, she of course was the same height as him. she pokes his chest plate as she talks

"You better not be lying to me. harboring a human is treason and you know dang well what the king will order me to do if he finds out you were lying and you were actually harboring a human" he smacks away her hand

"Of course i know what will happen! im the head of the royal guard. and you should know im not lying when i say im. not. harboring. a. human! now get the fuck out of my house you oversized lizard!" she growls at him a bit before walking over to his door and stopping just before she exits his room

"Sans...you know i don't wanna have to kill you, i hope for the sake of our friendship that you arent lying to me and your not a human lover." she leaves at that, he makes no move to get you out of the closet till he hears the slam of the front door. he sighs and pushes the bookshelf back to its orginal spot and opens the door, he spots you...well asleep, he sighs and grabs you by the arms before he starts shaking you

"Hey...HEY! MUTT WAKE UP!" when you don't even stir he sighs more. he realizes he's grabbing your arms and he does an experimental squeeze, your very squishy. he sets you down and takes off one of his gloves and feels your skin. its surprisingly soft and warm, your like a giant human pillow. he considers something before shaking that thought out of his head and puts back on his glove. he picks you up and drops you down on his Nuke shaped bed, he watches as you smile in your sleep at the comfortableness of his bed, and why wouldn't you? he has the very best beds around. he pulls up his blanket and decides to leave you there, he has the rest of giftmas and his work shift to do so he's not using his bed. he takes one more glance at your sleeping face before leaving, that bad feeling back in his non-existing gut again. he's sure that feeling will go away eventually...right?

* * *

You slowly open your eyes. man, who knew sleeping in a closet was so comfortable...and slightly boney? he probably left bones on the floor and you just didn't notice. you look to the clock and see its five in the morning, nearly six...wait, you don't remember a clock in the closet, or on your spot on the floor. you attempt to move but something is holding you down, you hear a mumble as whatever's holding you down squeezes you tighter. you somehow maneuver so your turned around to face whats holding you. what you weren't expecting was the fact its sans holding you, you hand to clamp a hand over your mouth to prevent yourself from screaming. who knows what will happen if he wakes up, most likely nothing good. he moves a bit since you've turned and he nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck as he tangles your legs together. you internally scream at this situation, but then again you've never been this close to sans when he's this peaceful...he's actually kinda cute. 'WOAH woah woah woah no. you stop that brain' you mentally scold yourself for thinking the guy who's tortured you, treats you like a dog, and made you go into a cramped closet is cute. maybe your developing Stockholm syndrome.

you hear the alarm go off and you quickly pretend your sleeping, you feel sans stir and sit up, letting his arms slip from around your form to press the stop on his alarm clock. you do your best to stay still and keep your breathing a normal pace so he won't know your awake. you hear him sigh "Well my experiment was correct." experiment? cuddling up to you is an experiment? "Humans are incredibly lazy, Mutt is still asleep despite its been many hours since I've shoved her into the closet." you very much regret thinking this guy was cute for a moment. you feel a foot at your side confused till your pushed off the bed, causing your head to hit his end table. you groan and sit up

"YOU ASS!"

"Good your finally awake, you should know better then to crawl into my bed while your asleep, your bed is downstairs." you grit your teeth and stand up with a huff, you open the door and slam it shut before marching down the stairs and flopping on your spot on the floor, closing your eyes and falling back asleep with dreams of an odd child with black and yellow stripes and a flower.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! the next chapter: cook time may vary (Yall will get it whenever I feel like I wanna write)


	9. The bear minimum danger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Looks like you're sent out on another dumb collection thing, but perhaps more will happen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sup yall, im back after not writing for a long time. I kinda lost muse for this story till now, so im back and I'll try to update it when I can.

its been while living with these skeletons, its started becoming routine for you now, sans slowly didn't seem as terrifying in your eyes as when you first met him. you actually got to know the skeleton a bit, and you do admit, he's kinda cute at times. your thoughts are cut short as you hear sans screaming for papyrus, it was a normal day of you prepping dinner with the kitchen knife they finally let you use. there was some odd hush, hush talking coming from the living room but you ignored it till sans walked in

"Mutt! you will be picking up an item from someone" you sighed and put the knife down, he squinted seeing you weren't wearing your collar "where is your collar?"

"didn't wanna wear it, so I took it off" he looked as if he was gonna say something, but just smiled and refrained from it, he just shoved a piece of paper in your hands

"Go pick up this item, if you bring it back in good quality I will return some of your items" you perked up a bit at that, you've been wanting to get to a fresh change instead of having to go commando every time you needed to swap panties.

"Fine, lemme finish up here and I'll go" you stuffed the paper in your pocket and went back to chopping as sans left the room, going back to the usual yelling at his brother being lazy. you kept chopping till finished, cleaned off the knife but didn't put it away, you decided to wrap it up in a cloth and stuff it in your boot for later, you might need it. you walked out from the kitchen, grabbing your hoodie and putting it on "Later assholes" you walked out, slamming the door as you did. unaware of what awaits you out there.

sans on the other hand knew exactly what was gonna happen, as soon as you left that door he soon followed after, after telling an excuse to his brother. his patience with you has worn thin and he wanted to see how you dealt the monsters in the forest, perhaps you'll die. the thought of looking you in the eye as you died was a wonderful thought to think about. he stayed a good distance from her to make sure he wasn't seen as he followed her, she headed into the forest as said on the directions on the paper he gave. he could already tell some monsters saw you without the collar, and heading into the darkness of the woods. a particular one, bear monster headed into the forest, he followed as he watched the bear carefully follow till both she, and the bear reached an opening in the woods. this was gonna be fun to enjoy, he climbs up one of the trees to watch this go down.

you looked around the opening, not seeing anyone here you sighed, assuming this was a stupid trick from sans to make you walk there and back in the cold with your thin hoodie. you were about to head back when you heard the snow crunch, someone was here. you stepped to the side just in time to dodge a clawed hand coming down to strike you. you backed up as the bear monster looked at you with an evil grin

"Well, well, well. a human out here all by yourself, just ripe for the taking. with your little soul I could easily take down that idiot Toriel and take the rest of the souls, I'll be all-powerful!" he starts laughing maniacally, you back away more, before you could turn to run he seemed to start charging at you, claws bearing. you rolled to the side but got nicked in the arm, you thought about running, but this guy was fast, you would be dead meat if you ran. you remembered the knife in your boot and quickly took it out, unwrapping it from the towel and holding it, getting into a stance. though that seemed to just make him chuckle "You think a weakling like you could defeat me with a flimsy knife? HA! now, I will skin you and use you for carpet!" 

you waited for him to charge at you again, you stepped to the side and swung the knife to cut at his cheek, he seemed more angered by the fact you got a hit in and started to try and claw at you. you had a hard time dodging, getting hurt quite a few times, but you cut him a couple times yourself. he had backhanded you and you ended up going flying, rolling till you hit a tree, you coughed and was trying to get up, you felt his foot step on your back

"Weak, can't even stand up to me. you think you and your one LV can do anything to stop me? how pathetic" you glared at him and gripped the knife tightly in your hand, you quickly stabbed him deep in the leg  stepping on you, he recoiled back, this gave you a chance to quickly get up and slice at his throat, you cut through the fur and skin, he grips at his throat and falls to his knees. you stood over him and raised the knife in the air, stabbing it between his eyes. you watched as the look of shock and pain fades to nothing but dust. you wheeze, the adrenaline from this fight distracting you from the pain and the cold. you flicked some blood and dust off the knife. you felt so many things right now.

glad that you stopped him from killing you, guilt that you just killed someone, fear in yourself, and a sick sense of thrill from the fact you fought for your life. you chuckled a little, before going into full-on laughter, you didn't know why you were laughing, maybe so you won't feel the guilt for just a moment. your laughter soon calmed as you walked over with stumbled steps and picked back up the towel, you wrap back up the knife and stick it into your boot before walking back to the cursed skeleton brother's house. you had a bone to pick with sans, but also felt too tired from the adrenaline dropping and the feeling of sadness washing over you.

* * *

sans was perched upon the tree, watching as you had narrowly dodged that attack. he had to admit, you were pretty good at dodging, but there was no way you're coming out of this alive, not without a stroke of luck. he was surprised at the fact you brought a knife with you, he knew it was the same kitchen knife you were just using earlier. he thought about perhaps heading down the tree so he can look you in the eye, but he felt sort of mesmerized by how you fought, the determination in your e/c eyes, and the way you were fighting for your life.

he was at the edge of his seat, or well branch as he saw you get hit away like a fly. this was it, this was the moment you were gonna die, but why is it he felt a sort of tightness welling up in his chest. he hardly noticed his own hand over where his soul is, if it was cloth he would have been gripping it tightly by now. but you somehow prevailed and killed the monster, he felt an odd sense of relief that you hadn't died yet. he kept his eyes trained on your face, wondering if you were gonna break, or cry. this was your first kill, but you instead laughed like you had gone crazy or something.

yet that look of sadness on your face and the way your soul dimed a bit made him feel...well something, he couldn't explain the feeling but he didn't like it one bit. he saw you walking off and knew he had to get down and head off, his duties were soon so he had a valid reason to go. but he still stalled and waited till you were out of sight by the trees before going down the tree, glancing at the pile of dust that coated the snow before walking off, vanishing to do his work.

* * *

 you finally got back to the house, you opened the door and saw paps relaxing on the couch smoking, he looked over his shoulder at you. he took a long drag of his cig before breathing it out and saying 

**"YOU LOOK LIKE SHIT."**

"Wow, thanks captain obvious" you closed the door behind you and took off your boots and jacket, depositing the knife into the sink before heading upstairs into the bathroom to shower off the dust. you decided to stay there for awhile, letting the hot water warm you and wash away your problems. 

once you stepped out of the shower, drying off your hair with a towel. you noticed that the blue was fading a lot, soon your natural h/c hair will be the only color on your head. you walked down the stairs and saw sans there, whispering something to papyrus. he noticed you and cleared his throat. 

"Mutt! I was given a report today, it was from a local monster saying they saw you kill another monster" you started to internally worry a tad. with how used to things around here you've gotten, you forgot that he was captain of the royal guard. "I am impressed, you managed to kill a big foe, and I cannot deny that a show of skill like that must be at least respected a little" he grabbed something and held it out to you, it was your bag!. you took it from him and backed up to your dog bed, you sat down and checked it for all your stuff. everything was there except one granola bar and your large lockpick kit

"Looking for this?" he held up the kit "You won't be getting this back, no need for a lockpick set when your just gonna eventually die down here, but everything else in there is fine, and you may keep them." you squinted at him and just took out your blanket and pillow, setting it up on top of the thin blanket and doggy bed. at least this is a little more comfortable. 

Sans had a conflicted look on his face as he thought about something "And mutt...i.." he seems to be trying to say something, but nothing's coming out. Paps nudged him and did the 'go on' gesture "Mutt listen up! because I'll only say it once. I...think it would be beneficial for your living down here if you and I got along" you raised a brow at him, he was awaiting your response "...well?...say something mutt!"

"So..you wanna be my friend or something?" he thinks about it

"Yes, I think being 'friends' would be beneficial to both of us" you couldn't see at all how this would be beneficial to you, or him. except maybe him getting to know you and using that against you

"No thanks."

"No thanks?! how dare you just deny my offer! why I otta-"

"Because of that! because I know you don't have a nice bone on your damn body. you get joy from pain, satisfaction from suffering, why would I wanna be friends with someone that is so narrow-minded and cruel that you can't even see that being an asshole 24/7  doesn't get you anywhere. I may be an ass at times, but at least I know when to show compassion and kindness" he took a deep breath, even though he doesn't need to do such a thing

"You know nothing of me, I can be kind and compassionate, but down here you can't because you wanna know why? showing weakness down here, showing kindness will get you killed. I admit, I do enjoy the pain of others, but that's because it makes me feel alive. you think you know everything but you know nothing. why don't _you_ think about perhaps putting yourself in someone else's shoes to understand" he turned to the door and opened it before slamming it shut.

"WOW...THAT WAS TENSE, BUT I AGREE WITH M'LORD, THINGS DOWN HERE ARE HARSH, IT'S TOUGH LIVING HERE AND MAKING THE MOST OF IT. BUT, I ALSO AGREE THAT SOMETIMES YOU GOTTA BE KIND, SO WHY NOT BE A LITTLE KIND TO M'LORD? COULD GO A LONG WAY" you thought about it, taking out one of the granola bars and eating it. maybe you didnt understand, but you dont really need to, the people here are cruel and evil...but, it does make you curious to what exactly happened to cause everyone to be this way in the first place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope yall enjoyed this chapter! and remember, the hits and kudos keep my blood pumping to write


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